literalizing:

Teacher: *gives 25 minute speech about wasting time*  

when am I going to grow the balls to fucking kill my pathetic ass self already

uncomfortablecucumber:
“ This is money cat. He only appears every 1,383,986,917,198,001 posts. If you repost this in 30 seconds he will bring u good wealth and fortune.
”

When you have a bond with someone, it’s not easy to leave them alone. You deal with a lot of their shit because you want them in your life.

prowling-lights:
“This pun…..oh man…..
”

White People Problem #62

whitepeopleproblms:

when your father only gives you a small loan of 1 million dollars

"You will fall in love with someone who’s cold and always seemingly pushing you away. When all is said and done, they will be forever known as the one person you couldn’t get to love you. Unfortunately, it will hurt and sting worse than the good ones, the ones that chopped up your meat for you and picked out an eyelash from your eye and were nice to your mother, because love often feels like a game we need to win."
Ryan O’Connell, The People You Will Fall in Love With in Your 20s
(via wordsnquotes)

cute things about the signs

queen-meme-xoxo:

aries: shouts at the tv

taurus: scared of the dark

gemini:  hums to self a lot

cancer: laughs at things that aren’t funny

leo: is too stubborn to wear sun protection and then gets burned

virgo: needs to google everything just in case

libra: a sore loser at board games

scorpio: learns the whole of a rap song 

sagittarius: knocks everything over 

capricorn: needs to wear 39038 layers to stay warm

aquarius: falls asleep in the car

pisces: saves pictures of the life they want

"He played the type of music people fell in love to."
The first time I rode in his car (via razorbladewrists)